I might never say anything, but I’m guilty of sometimes being a Judgey-McJudgerson in my head. I don’t always get the whole picture. For instance, I see a child wearing a bizarre outfit that they clearly dressed themselves in (but mom may be wanting to pick her battles). A mom breastfeeding a 6-year-old in the middle of tech rehearsal. A child behaving so badly and parents not paying a lick of attention. But don’t we all break our own rules sometimes? Or the social norms of the world? Now, I’m not condoning bad manners or impolite behavior, but I am saying that we moms need to knock out some of that judgement against others and ourselves.
It took me being pregnant and craving frozen custard at 4pm on a Friday night to let my family have ice cream for dinner. Before becoming a parent, and even as the mom of a young child, I thought I’d never do that. I’m sure you’ve had your own thoughts about what your plans for parenthood would be and then what the realities were. This summer, I’ve let my standards relax and bend the rules. Mostly, I want Red to have some special moments before and after Scarlett’s birth. I want him to know that he’s not left out, and that he’s still special, but I’m well aware that it’s spoiling him a little. I think that’s ok.
We had breakfast in bed one morning when Nonna was here before Scarlett arrived. A second giant honey biscuit from our local biscuit shack and milk in the bed. HONEY, I tell you. A possible sticky mess, but we let it fly. Even Nonna had her chicken biscuit in bed with morning TV alongside Red. And they loved it.
A week later, it was splash day. We had nearly missed National Donut Day, so we skipped a healthy breakfast at home and on our way to school, stopped for donuts. Delicious, non-brain food on a school day, but we had a lot of fun. Red was very happy… and I didn’t feel bad about it. Were there other kids there? No. Did his teachers sense sugary donut crust on his lips? Probably. But let’s not judge each other for treating ourselves or bending the rules every now and again. After all, we’re human.
What rules have you bent in your family that you feel you shouldn’t be judged for? Has anyone ever drawn attention to what you were doing? Did you feel the need to defend your choices?
I am incredibly proud to be a Partner of the Sisterhood of Motherhood with Similac, and they generously sponsored my discussion starter. The Sisterhood of Motherhood believes it’s time to embrace parents who choose to embrace parenthood, because no two of us are the same, and we’re all in this together. We need to nourish each other the same way we nourish our kids. The Sisterhood (all of us!) is there to help you get through the first few days and months of motherhood with confidence — and zero judgment. And I firmly believe that’s way it should be. #SisterhoodUnite #ParentsFirst #NoJudgement